The Town Drunk  
When Science Fiction Clichés Go Bad

The Planet of the Amazon Women

Zack Braveheart whipped off his spacesuit with a flourish, revealing his tanned, athletic, and completely naked physique to the Amazon Women of Planet Medea III. “And I am what you call a man.” He put his hands on his hips and waited triumphantly for their awe.

The redhead in the leopard-print muumuu cocked her head to the side and stared at the strange new sight. “Well, we’ve certainly never seen one of those before.”

The throng of muscular woman murmured their assent, and Zack flushed with pride, waiting for the inevitable orgy to begin.

The redhead nodded to the tall brunette in the zebra-striped sarong. “It’ll have to go.”

Zack watched the brunette grip her sword in a way that he normally would have found invigorating, and as he was pinned down by the mob of scantily-clad women, he screamed in bitter outrage that this scenario was going to have a wildly different ending than it did in his dreams.

Copyright © 2006 Jennifer Pelland

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